Home   About   Connect   Bonus   Wedded Blissters   Book
RSS Twitter Facebook YouTube

The Key to a Better Marriage is Laughter

Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he drank his fair-trade, organic, Rainforest Alliance decaffeinated green tea before it was cool.

Photo Credit: Creative Commons – Rosalie Marie

Ok, maybe I shouldn’t quit my day job and become a comedian after that joke but laughter, humor and comedy are integral parts of our culture.

We love to laugh.

Many people have careers that consist of making people laugh, but did you know it is also a crucial component to your marriage and relationships? My wife (Jen) and I have found that laughter in our marriage has helped create deeper communication.

Jen and I love to make each other laugh, this may be similar within your family.

Families That Laugh Together, Stay Together

Everyone gets home from their day at work or school, and everyone is sitting around the dinner table sharing about their day. It never fails that our favorite stories to tell are the ones that we know our families are going to laugh at because we love to see them smile.

Luckily, Jen and I work with people so we usually have a lot of great stories to share, or sometimes we are really odd in public. Once my flip flop fell off walking into Wal-Mart, not one but three times and it was run over, and it was of course the busiest day at the store ever. We share these stories, not only because it was part of our day, but also because we value making each other laugh.

We also love to laugh with our friends, very similarly, we will share stories about how one of us also uses the wrong type of knife to cut something or how the other insists on playing the ukulele instead of being productive. When we share these stories with our friends we realize that they have similar stories and we will laugh until our cheeks hurt.

Marriage Isn’t Always Fun and Games

However, our household is not always full of laughter. As in many families we have disagreements, like when one of us leaves dirty socks scattered around the house, or doesn’t place the dishes in the proper order to be washed.

Yes, in the heat of the moment we may not be laughing or think the situation is funny at all. In hindsight though, we can look back and see how insignificant those arguments were.

We have all heard the phrase from Ephesians 4:26 “Don’t let the sun go down on your anger.”

Many times Jen and I will be settling in for the night and be laughing at how we responded to a situation or how we reacted at different times, because we do not want to go to sleep angry. We are imperfect and being able to realize and admit that to your spouse or significant other is a great step towards deeper communication with them.

The Lesson of Laughing

I believe the secret to deeper communication in relationships is our ability to make ourselves vulnerable. If you build up walls and guards around yourself then it really hinders communication. Once you can let down your insecurities, realize and admit we are imperfect and find humor in our mistakes. That is when communication thrives!

This is something Jen and I are constantly learning in our marriage and something that we hope to share with you!

Communication is how relationships grow, and deep communication is extremely rewarding, feel free to laugh at yourself and with your spouse!

Question: What makes you and your spouse laugh?

EdiTOR’s Note: Our family recently delivered our third child. As such, some blogging buddies of mine have graciously offered to write a series of guest posts to allow my family to spend a little time together – away from this blog. I’m deeply grateful for such friends, and I hope you enjoy their writing!

Today’s guest post is from Stephen Uchacz, who writes regularly over at at his blog http://smutoday.ca  You can also connect with him on twitter @smuchacz or in the comments section below.

  • http://bit.ly/hWr7Cw Rob T

    Great point!

    • http://smutoday.ca Stephen Uchacz

      Thanks Rob!

  • http://www.adjuvancy.com/wordpress Roy A. Ackerman, Ph.D., E.A.

    A sense of humor is critical for life. Especially the ability to laugh at oneself. Taking oneself too seriously is the prescription for disaster.

    • http://smutoday.ca Stephen Uchacz

      Yes, I completely agree!

  • http://twitter.com/shawnrsnyder Shawn Snyder

    This is such a good point. To many times marriage gets treated to all the responsible stuff but none of the fun. Let the laughter begin.

    • http://smutoday.ca Stephen Uchacz

      Yes in all the preparations leading up to marriage responsibilities get talked about first then tagged on at the end is “make time for yourself” some extra focus should be put on how to do that and I think laughter is a great way!

  • http://www.encourageyourspouse.com/ Lori Ferguson

    Great post, Stephen! My husband and I tend to be more serious in outlook and because we’re aware of the benefits of laughter, we’re deliberate in spending time with friends who make us laugh, watching programs that make us laugh and even sharing ‘punny’ jokes. It’s silly – but we’re even serious about laughing enough… (sigh). :-)

    • http://smutoday.ca Stephen Uchacz

      Jen and I laugh so much with friends! When we go to visit this one couple I always do face stretches in the car on the way there because I know we will be laughing so hard I don’t want to pull a muscle!

  • Michelle Woodman

    Great post, Stephen! Laugh lines trump frown lines, I say. And they’re better for one’s soul. :-)

    • http://smutoday.ca Stephen Uchacz

      Absolutely! The benefits are endless!

  • http://HumorOutcasts.com/ Donna Cavanagh

    nice post! My husband and I laugh all the time. We just find the humor in most everything. It cuts down on a lot of squabbling.

    • http://smutoday.ca Stephen Uchacz

      We find this as well in our marriage, the more we are able to laugh about things the easier it is to put issues into perspective.

  • http://shipboundfortarshish.wordpress.com/ Bonnie Anderson

    Great, encouraging post. Laughter is essential in a marriage – it’s a gift.

    • http://smutoday.ca Stephen Uchacz

      Completely! Thanks for reading!

  • http://somewiseguy.com/ ThatGuyKC

    Laughter is definitely the best medicine. My wife and I often laugh at/with each other and use it to relieve tension. We love to laugh and watch comedies and funny tv shows together. Friends is a personal fav.