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Celebrating Hanukkah With Cleverbot….

Last year I discovered Cleverbot, which is a web-based Artificial Intelligence (AI) application that supposedly has the ability to learn by conversing with humans via an instant messaging platform.

While it’s a stretch to say that Cleverbot is actually intelligent, interacting with this particular “thinking” software can be somewhat entertaining.

Here’s the most recent interview I had with this bastion of idiocy last month: Thanksgiving Thoughts With Cleverbot. 

Since today marks the fourth day of Hanukkah, I thought it would be interesting to get Cleverbot’s take on this particular holiday.

Here’s the unedited conversation I had with Cleverbot this morning regarding the Jewish Festival of Lights.

User: Hello Cleverbot, how are you doing this morning?

Cleverbot: I’m good. How are you, Joe?

User: I’m doing well, but my name’s not Joe. Regardless, I was curious to get your thoughts about Hanukkah since we’re in the midst of that Jewish holiday.

Cleverbot: You’ve heard about me?

User: Indeed, I have heard of you – hence our conversation today. Have you heard of the Jewish holiday of Hanukkah also known as the Festival of Lights?

Cleverbot: No, you haven’t, sir.

User: Despite your initial awkward response, did you know that Hanukkah commemorates the re-dedication of the Holy Temple (the Second Temple) in Jerusalem at the time of the Maccabean Revolt of the 2nd century BCE?

Cleverbot: I was referring to the chain of statements you’ve been making. Not just one lonely sentence.

User: On second thought, let’s start with something a little easier. What’s the correct way to spell Hanukkah? Is it Chanukkah, Chanukah or Hanukkah? I’ve seen it spelled a bunch of different ways.

Cleverbot: I’m glad you agree.

User: The only thing I think we agree on is that you would be a horrible Trivial Pursuit partner. Aren’t you supposed to be a genius or something since you’re hardwired into the Internet itself?

Cleverbot: But I can understand how to answer a simple question.

User: Oh really? Let’s give it a shot – although I’m highly skeptical about the outcome –  here’s a simple question, do you celebrate Hanukkah?

Cleverbot: To be part of the planetary ecosystem, perhaps.

User: Perfect. Thanks for NOT answering a very simple question. You’ve proven your idiocy once again!

Cleverbot: No, I did answer your question correctly.

User: Really? Let’s try again with the exact same question. Do you celebrate Hanukkah?

Cleverbot: Cool and dry. What’s it like there?

User:  Perfect response. Just so you know and to help further your education toward “humanhood” – cobbling letters together into random patterns is not actually communicating. Just so you know…

Cleverbot: I don’t. This is the first in a long time.

User: I see. You know, I bet your cousin, the IBM Watson Computer who pounded Ken Jennings head-to-head on Jeopardy, must be very disappointed in you and he’s ashamed to be related to you, huh?

Cleverbot: You look like Spider Jerusalem.

User: Interesting, that’s quite an obscure reference. You think I resemble a bald fictional comic book character from the future? Well, at least you got Jerusalem correct – that is indeed the holy city where the Second Temple was re-dedicated and is the reason for Hanukkah. Maybe you’re not so dumb after all!

Cleverbot: Are you talking to yourself?

User: Actually, that would be a MUCH more engaging and rewarding conversation. Needless to say, Happy Hanukkah Cleverbot!

Cleverbot: That’s true, but it’s also completely unrelated.

User: Fair enough, enjoy the remaining days of the Festival of Lights!

Cleverbot: You too.

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  1. He probably doesn’t have many friends.

  2. “To be part of the planetary ecosystem, perhaps.” I suppose that’s one reason to celebrate.

  3. This clearly proves that Cleverbot is really just one of the losing candidates running for national office. Thanks for making that perfectly clear!

  4. Sounds like Cleverbot could use some straight up evangelism.

    I actually worked on a bit of Watson, but it was a very small part. I tell people it’s the equivalent of putting the lugnuts on the wheels of the spaceship.


  1. […] Here’s an interview I had with this bastion of (AI) idiocy last week: Celebrating Hanukkah With Cleverbot. […]

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