As a parent of two kids – plus another expected addition within the next few weeks – there are some things I love to hear my daughters say.
Such as, “You’re the greatest dad ever” or “I love you to the moon and back” or “I’m not going to date until I’m 35 years old!!!”
That’s music to my ears.
However, there are some phrases that I dread to hear coming from the mouths of my children. While I haven’t heard all of these yet – my two daughters are only preteens after all – I expect to hear a few of them in the near future. But I hope not:
- “Dad, I really like this Swedish death metal band called GoryTopia – they rock!”
- “I’m not sure which end of the cat it came out of, but there is a mess on your leather chair in the basement.”
- “Why can’t I get an iPhone 4S? I’m already 1o years old!”
- “So, the big screen TV in the basement is now a bunch of little teeny-tiny ‘screens’ on the floor.”
- “Daddy I’m so stoked! I won a contest to tour with the Swedish death metal band GoryTopia here in the US. I can meet up with them in Austin – isn’t that great!”
- “Come on, it’s not really a piercing if it’s functional! Look, I can sip a straw through it without opening my mouth while also attaching several of your fly-fishing lures at the same time.”
- “You’re so controlling! Why can’t I have my senior picture taken with a 12-inch, spiked pink-and-green mohawk???”
- “Ok, I’ve got some good news, some bad news, some really bad news – and some apocalyptic-caliber bad news.”
- “Why can’t I go on a date with a boy? I’m already 13 years old!”
- “I’ve decided that I want to skip my full-ride scholarship to Dartmouth and join a traveling carnival. The freedom of the open road beckons me.”
- “Please can we keep this full-grown pit bull that was wandering the neighborhood? I’m sure he’s house broken.”
- “Daddy, in Sweden you can get married at 16 and Alberik “Snark” Esbjorn – the lead singer of GoryTopia just proposed to me via Twitter – isn’t that romantic???”
Question: Are there any others that I may have missed that should be added?